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We are elated to present a blog post from our REAL Women Hampton Roads VA Lead Facilitator, Sheri Fayton. Sheri helps us understand the difference between doing and trying in a very personal, heartfelt way. Experience it here and share your thoughts by leaving us a comment
or emailing us at info@realwomenrock.org.
            

Quit Trying 

I’ve always been a competitive soul. It didn’t matter, whether it was related to grades, pageants, sports, career aspirations, or playing a game of monopoly…. I wanted to WIN. And I was going to do it at ALL COST!!   The sacrifice, sweat, tears, and blood were a welcome, even necessary component of winning…
so I thought.

I didn’t realize the insidious process of my soul becoming acclimated to the excruciating agony it felt as I chased my ‘win’. That agony would never allow me to Quit TRYING, not even if the sacrifice was ME!!

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Quit trying?!?!? What kind of nonsense is that???

We’re taught as little girls to “ALWAYS try your best” and as adults, “Winners never quit.” Sooo, I kept trying.
Year after year.
Separation after separation.
Devastation after devastation.
Broken promise after promise.

I TRIED and I TRIED and I TRIED and I TRIED.

I tried even as I lost hope in my own purpose. I kept trying even while noticing my ability to love and be present with others was becoming a burden rather than a joy. I kept trying even as I began to turn my back on the One who created me because surely a loving God would not ALLOW me to go through such pain, humiliation, turmoil, confusion, and loss! I kept trying….

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Until the ONLY thing left was the ‘Win!’ There was none of me.
Somewhere along the way, I had learned my insatiable desire to save a relationship had become more vital than saving me.

So, I quit trying.

For me, ‘trying’ had shifted (at some point) from an act to a state of ‘being’ that held me bondage and kept me stuck. ‘Trying’ had become a perpetual mindset not allowing me to move forward into wholeness. You see, all of my energy was monopolized in the ‘trying’ not allowing me to BECOME the very thing(s) I was created be.  So…

quit trying!

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